Gone To The Movies

I usually hate going to the movies. I just cannot stand being anywhere near the rude assholes that always end up sitting near me. I'm sure I'm not alone in this - cell phones, talking, kids, cell phones, rudeness, perverts, crack whores, more cell phones and inappropriate comments. Did I say cell phones?

2 of my favorite movie theater... incidents that stand out above the rest:

Way back in the mid 70's, my girlfriend and I went to see A Boy And His Dog at the Manor Theater in Charlotte N.C.. Things were going well until this man sat directly behind my girlfriend. Suddenly, my girlfriend let out a very loud holler, stood up and started yelling at the man behind her to stop slipping his hand between he seats and grabbing her breast. Well, I was about 17 or 18, a real rebel, and I wasn't going to stand for such...violations of my girlfriend, so I stood up and started screaming at the perv myself. Slowly, the man stood up and it wasn't hard for me to notice that he was way, way bigger and a whole lot weirder looking than I was hoping for!

He started to get upset himself exclaiming that it was just a slip and the boob grab was not intentional. For a moment I thought he might start kicking my ass at any moment, so I headed to the lobby, he followed, and we all eventually ended up in a yelling match that now included the theater manager. I insisted the perv get thrown out, but the manager would not do it, so we left. (Crazy movie by the way, but it is forever tainted...)

More recently (the 90's), Stacey and I were in theater in Emeryville (I don't remember what we were seeing, though) and we had the misfortune of sitting in front of a skinny ass crack whore with an eye patch, who was there with her very young child. Once the movie started, the crack whore started saying to Stacey; "'Scuze me. Can you scrunch down? I can't see!" and she kept it up until I turned to her and told her "No. She's not going to scrunch down!" We than turned back to the movie (which has now been completely ruined) and the crack whore started a barrage of crap, telling us she was going to make this the worst movie going experience we have ever had. I hope her little child was absorbing the wonderful example his crack whore mom was giving him.

I finally grabbed Stacey, telling her I just don't want to deal with this, and we went and sat somewhere else. As I sat there, I was hoping some giant redneck asshole would get our vacated seats and would then have to deal with the crack whore, hopefully in a more...violent manner than is was willing to give up. Nope. A tiny little Asian couple sat there and fortunately for them, there heads were not in the way of the skinny ass crack whore. Foiled again.

Anyways....I did go to the movies with Stacey last Sunday to see The Mist. Pretty good horror flick with decent acting, couple of good scares, interesting story and an ending that I liked very much. You just don't see endings like that very often.

And yes, there was a jerk behind us talking and commenting through the whole thing up until he left, because frankly, I think the movie started to freak him out. Good. But I do love movie theater popcorn!

Gil